As I was visiting with a client about how their child was eating I noticed out of the corner of my eye the child listening to the mom and I talk about what a "picky eater" they were. The child seemed to be smiling and feeling "proud" that the mother was talking about him/her. "Hmmm", I thought to myself, "the children are loving this attention!" Then I started noticing this with more and more families I work with. The children lived up to what they heard their moms talking about with others in order to get the mom's attention. "This makes mommy proud" is the impression I got. So a year ago I started counseling families to instead use the word "choosy" instead of labeling their child as "picky". This can be more positive and when the child hears you say that he/she is "choosy" they can grow into that expectation and moms are less frustrated. The child can then be set up to choose this or that based on only 2 options presented to them at meals or snacks. They can practice "choosing" from healthy options and learn habits that will help them when faced with choices at school or away from home.
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